Long Overdue.... Colton Levi Rock

My newest little love Colton Levi Rock

uh will i get like arrested for posting these pic since i pretty much jacked it from the Our365 website peeps who have photographers walk around the hospital trying to get a photo shoot with you & your newborn... & I am like seriously?? I was in the I-am-tired-too-many-visitors- i-have close-fam/friends-who-are-awesome-photographer-so-why-would-we-want-a stranger-taking-pictures-stop-coming-to-pester-me mood... hahaha and then i end up using these pics anyway.
oh well! here they are anyway lol

2 Days old here :)
Gosh i dont even have time for the entire longest birth story ever. I was healthy all the way up to 6 months. ran a little 5K @ 5 months. I was playing in a vball league & running to stay in shape and then BOOOM i got sick and gained all the lame weight back.
Had KIDNEY STONES @ 35 weeks pregnant!!! WHAT?! yeah you're tellin me!!! it was TERRIBLE! I would never wish it upon anyone! maybe on Casey Anthony... ok that was not very Christlike. sorry. (not really) but I thought i was in labor & wanted to punch Levi in the face when he was driving me to E.R. bc I was in so much pain & he doesnt run the freakin yellow light AND THEN he PASSES the dang hospital! i seriously thought i was going to die!!!! & while I am feeling like my life is about to end due to excruciating pain my husband wants drive like a blind foreigner! i was like pounding on the car door & all he did was laugh @ me, which instantly infuriates me more.... it is super hilarious looking back at the whole situation though haha.

We had 3 false alarms. 1st kidney stones. the other 2 were just heavy contractions from my body stressing from the kidney stones. I wasnt dilated enough so there wasnt much to do. 4th times the charm though. What sucks is baby was 75% effaced & I was @ a 4 cm but no contractions & again no pain. so we waited for 2 days. went back & had crazy contractions but this time baby was breached and the nurse could practically hold his foot through the birth canal. nonetheless we had to have an emergency C-Section which was a blessing bc the umbilical cord was wrapped around Colton's neck 3 times :( poor little guy. If we had tried to have him naturally it could have been a mess. The doc tried turning him multiple times but he kept turning back so we just did C-Section. NEVER AGAIN do I want that. Recover was MISERABLE!!! but oh so worth it having our little guy home and happy.

him and his little baby zits. is it weird that i think they are cute!?

happy & healthy

ok this pic is mine bc you obviously cant see the copyright logo but I love how Emett is so protective and loving to his little brother. That was the one thing we were so worried about. How Emett would react to having a new one in the house that demands just as much if not more of our attention... he is doing wonderfully! a little aggressive at times with the hugs and kisses, i dont think he realizes that his little brother is not indestructible. Its awesome watching him kiss him randomly or talk to him when they are alone and he thinks no one is listening. He says stuff like "here you have the baby truck bc I am a big boy" He always calls him "brudder" we tell him his name is Colton but he insists "no mommy its brudder!" if someone asks him what his baby brother's name is he says "Colton Wolton" so that has kinda become his nic-name for now :)

Emett boy & Colton wolton <3 bffs

I have a over thousand pics of these little guys & the past fam events from the end of summer, coaching, parties, bbq's, holidays etc, but lets get real here i suck at blogging & every time i want to upload a pic i find like 8 other pics & their associated stories i want to include which takes me even longer to sort through my thoughts and captions about what to say.

Goodness transitioning from 1 to 2 kids was quite the adjustment for me. I have heard that 3 kids is the magic number. Meaning, once you have the 3rd one then it doesnt matter if you have 3 or 10 kids.... geeeeze are you kidding?? That is an entire post alone so I wont even go there on my thoughts about that.
I started another journal for Colton and finished Emett's "First Year" journal. I have also been trying to keep up on my own journal for myself bc man after having the 2nd baby I NEED some ME TIME and a place to unload my thoughts an feelings.
I had a little "mommy melt down" which is again... another post but it brought me and my hubby closer together and snapped me into reality as well as humbled me to get back on track spiritually as well as physically & mentally.
nutshell version:

• overwhelming yet relaxing
  
• exhausting yet still driven
  
• always tired/sleepy/groggy but somehow had energy
  
• draining yet fulfilling
  
• unappreciated but knew I was loved
  
• depressed yet exhilarating & joyous

uh can we say BI-POLAR???!!! yeah thats what it felt like. I felt like I was battling some internal conflict with myself.
In the end I was just trying to do too much & be maintain a "super-mom" image but it just ate away at me. I am totally over it and have learned so much about myself and others.
We cant stretch ourselves too thin or run faster than that which we are able. all things in moderation. balance. in all things.
I am just so blessed to have an amazing life & a wonderful husband that loves unconditionally & helps with literally everything around the house and with the boys.

I had the longest chat with my older sister & she is always so amazing @ shedding light on different perspectives. It has been so hard for me to get to the gym & find some time for myself with the infant & and toddler, house work, cooking, callings, coaching, blah. I seriously wonder how our mothers did it with more than one child!!! I have such wonderful examples all around me. Some of which are reading this right now so I thank you for your love and support & fb posts & funny stories or comments or just the way you live your life. My sister shared a quote from Elder Faust which, for the life of me I cannot find & dont want to butcher it so I will just share in my own thoughts. but he talks about taking time for ourselves as an individual so that we can grow & be healthy and be better versions of ourselves so that we will have "more of ourselves & a better quality of ourselves to give to our loved ones". I cant help but think about my boys and my family. I want the best for them. I want to be energetic and active & healthy so that they have the best version of ME i can give in whatever aspect or regard they need at any given time. That is what motivates me to not only be a better person, mom, wife, sister, friend, neighbor but it depletes any doubts or laziness I am feeling & instills confidence & a burst of energy when i need it most. Because, in the end, its not really about me but always about them and how I can improve spiritually, mentally, physically for myself obviously, but more importantly for others.
We make much more of a difference than we know. That thought keeps me grounded.
My boys keep me moving. Its always nice to have something to live for. busy busy busy weeks ahead.... so here we go....
oh and btw he is 4 months now..... yeah i know its been forever!